


A Fancy Dinner Party

by Vixen13



Series: One Shots [2]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Dancing, Flirting, Humor, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, One Shot, Peter being all sexy damn son
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-03
Updated: 2016-11-03
Packaged: 2018-08-28 20:24:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8461735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vixen13/pseuds/Vixen13
Summary: Fic based on this prompt: Wade has to go to a fancy shmancy dinner party for a job. While he’s there, he seems to have caught the eye of a Mr. Peter Parker, who’s actually the trophy husband of Wade's target. It’s really hard to do a job when Peter seems relentless to have Wade.http://spideypool-prompts.tumblr.com/post/152626748575/prompt-109





	

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this and edited what I could on my own in like three hours. Please forgive any mistakes! lol

The dinner party was in full swing by the time Wade arrived. A bunch of very rich people who owned very big companies wearing very expensive outfits gathered in a very posh building in order to turn their noses up at each other. To say that Wade looked out of place would be an understatement.

Unlike all the very pretty people in attendance, Wade was rugged, weathered, covered in scars - and missing most of one eyebrow. Even spiffed up in the suit as he was with his head freshly shaved, he stuck out like a sore thumb. Not that it mattered. Even with all the side glances from party goers and security eyeballing him, Wade would get to his target and get out before anyone was the wiser.

You see, Wade had a very well known reputation as Deadpool, the person you called when you needed someone dead. Thus Wade’s battered appearance. He had survived a lot over the years, but that’s what made him the best. He always lived. And his target always died.

Currently, his target was a one Harry Osborn. Son of man who had made OsCorp the powerhouse company it was today. Harry had recently taken over the company after his father passed. There were plenty of people who didn’t like that and wanted Harry out of the way so they could take over instead. One such person had filled Wade’s bank account rather nicely.

Wade had done his research on the man. Harry was careful and paranoid, as he should be with people gunning for him. He was struggling to keep the stockholders happy after taking over, and was making a lot of public appearances in order gain needed support from his social group of rich people. Still, plenty of people didn’t like Harry. They especially didn’t like the fact that Harry had married a man of zero status.

Of course, Harry had done a lot to fix that. He had groomed that person into everything he possibly could in order to gain favor from others. Wade heard rumors that their marriage was no longer doing so well after all of that.

Pacing around the edge of the room, Wade watched his target. Harry always surrounded himself with people and there was a not so subtle body guard at his back constantly. His high level of security is what made this a difficult hit. Wade couldn’t just sneak in, shoot, and sneak out. No, he had to find a way to get close by acting like just another party goer.

Which was fine by Wade. It meant free food for him. He snatched a weird looking shrimp concoction off of a plate as a server passed and ate it in one bite. His eyes rolled in his head as he savored it. Man, rich people parties had such great snacks.

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were a food critic.”

Wade’s eyes snapped over to the person who had spoken. Beside him was a man in a finely tailored suit that was cut so close it left little to the imagination of what the body underneath looked like. The man was lean and muscular, but in a very slim way, like an acrobat. He had warm brown eyes and messy hair that was styled in a way that complemented its crazy antics instead of trying to control it. The man’s smile was charming, and a hint seductive.

“You’ve sampled every piece of food here and you seemed to enjoy them all.” The man continued.

“What’s the point of serving expensive food if the guests aren’t meant to enjoy it?” Wade smirked.

The man chuckled. “You have a point. After all, the food is the only good part about parties like this.”

Oh, so he didn’t like the snooty rich parties either? Wade was intrigued. “Well, it’s not the _only_ good part of this particular party.” Wade all but purred, his eyes blatantly running up and down the man’s body.

That move earned him a very playful grin in response, which was odd. It usually earned him a slap to the face. “My name is Peter.”

“Wade.”

“Do you mind escorting me around the party, Wade? Social engagements are tiring, but if I’m already engrossed in conversation, I’ll be left alone.”

Wade grinned. “Using me, are you?”

“Very much so.” Peter winked. “Do you mind it?”

The little minx! Wade was completely entranced. “No, I don’t mind at all. It would mean I could enjoy looking at you all that much longer.”

Peter laughed and wound his arms around one of Wade’s. “You’re not subtle, but you sure know how to flatter a guy.”

Was Peter _flirting_ with Wade? That couldn’t possibly be true, right? They started walking at a very leisurely pace as they made their way around the room. “So what made you pick me out of all the others here?”

“I like a man with taste.” Peter said as he snatched a passing hor d’oeuvre from a platter. He took a bite of it, rolling it around his mouth like he was making love to it. Wade couldn’t stop watching that move. Then Peter held up the rest to Wade with a coquettish grin.

Never one to back down from a challenge, Wade bent down took the bite from Peter’s fingers, letting his tongue linger on the soft pads of those long digits. Peter didn’t pull away or look in any way embarrassed, instead he just gave Wade a sly smile as if Wade had passed some sort of test.

“I think we’ll get along well.” Peter said casually when Wade finally pulled back. Peter held eye contact as he licked a leftover crumb from the side of his thumb.

“You’re quite the player, aren’t you?”

“Mm, only to those I _really_ like.” Peter smirked as he lead them over to a table full of drinks.

“And you like people who enjoy food?”

“I like people who aren’t full of themselves.” Peter waved his free arm to indicate the rest of the room.

“Oh, I am quite full of myself, I hate to disappoint you.”

Peter laughed as he snatched up a flute of champagne. “You want any?”

“It’s best if I don’t drink.”

“Your loss.” Peter didn’t argue, which was unusual. People typically argued a lot when you refused a drink.

They started walking again, talking about the most inane topics. Peter never once asked probing questions, which Wade found odd but pleasant. He would’ve had to make up lies if Peter had tried it. So it was nice to just be able to talk to someone about TV shows, movies, and pop culture. Peter was quite the geek.

“How is someone as sexy and geeky as you single at a party like this?” Wade finally asked.

Peter grinned. “I’m not single.”

Wade’s eyebrows rose to his would be hairline. “Then I take it your lover isn’t here tonight to see you so enamoured of another man.”

The grin that spread on Peter’s face was almost wicked. “Oh, no. He is.” Peter raised his glass to point at someone across the room. Wade turned to look and stopped breathing for a moment.

“Harry Osborn.”

“Correct.” Peter said casually, taking a sip of his drink.

Wade turned back to give Peter a calculating look. “I heard he married a ‘lowly commoner’. Is it true you’re having problems in the marital bed?” Wade wasn’t pulling any punches since Peter had neglected to mention he was married during all this flirting.

Peter rolled his eyes, but didn’t seem all that bothered. “People talk too much. But it’s not untrue. Harry and I rarely see each other these days outside of the mandatory public outing.”

“And you’re still with him?”

“He’s my best friend. I want to help him do what’s best for his company as well.”

“By clinging to someone else’s arm.”

“Ah, well, the next rumor is also true. We opened our marriage.” Peter cut his eyes over, giving Wade a look full of promises. Wade couldn’t stop his anatomy from reacting to it.

“I still don’t get it. It’s well known Harry’s husband is a genius. I’m sure you two could still be friends without you being shackled to his side. That way you could make your own empire.”

Peter grinned. “You flatter me. But inventions require money to make and money to produce and money to distribute. I come from a rather poor family, as you pointed out.”

“The Osborn name can’t convince a bank to fund you?”

“Prenup.” Peter shrugged. “Harry’s lawyers insisted on it. If we divorce, I go back to being poverty stricken and I don’t get to keep the Osborn name. Harry is being a good man by continuing our marriage. It’s his way of protecting me from his own company. Besides, he lets me take the lead now on most of the charity projects.”

“That makes you a trophy husband.”

“Flirt.” Peter grinned.

“Should you be telling me all this personal information?”

Peter looked Wade in the eye as he took another sip from his drink. “Is it not relevant to you?” He asked suggestively.

“You hardly know me.”

“You’re right. I’d like to get to know every last bit of you.” Peter held up the half empty drink between, a challenge clear in his eyes. “Would you like to dance?”

There was a pause as Wade’s brain screamed at him to not follow his groin’s instincts, but Wade was a lost cause. He took the drink from Peter’s hand, downed the rest in a single gulp, and all but slammed it on the nearest table. Then lead them over to the dance floor where the live band was playing.

If Peter was surprised that Wade could dance, he didn’t show it. Wade took lead, which didn’t bother Peter. He was all feminine sensual grace as he twirled and spun around the floor with Wade. They made their way through two waltzes and a foxtrot. After that, the band seemed to be play to them. Picking songs that would best compliment their style of dance.

Wade’s mind was going a mile a minute. This hit had suddenly become complicated. If Peter ever found out it was Wade who had killed Harry, it would be over between them before it even started. And it was highly likely Peter would find out since Wade’s alias to get into the party was an endless loop of fake credentials.

Normally, he’d convince himself he was doing the neglected spouse a favor by leaving them their husband’s fortune. But in Peter’s case, that wouldn’t be true. Killing Harry would kill Peter’s future. Even if Peter was trying to find a way to get income of his own that wasn’t controlled by Oscorp funding, it would take time. Time Peter wouldn’t have if Harry died today.

It wasn’t like Deadpool hadn’t refused hits before, but usually they were for much better reasons than “I wanna put my dick in it.” That might have an effect on Deadpool’s reputation. Then again, his reputation wasn’t all that clean to begin with, so maybe it didn’t matter so much. Of course, the hit would just go to someone else if Wade refused it. Was he willing to stick around and protect the arrogant head of Oscop in order to bone the trophy husband?

Wade dropped Peter into a dip at the end of the dance. Peter had one arm out to dramatize the move, his other firmly wrapped around Wade’s shoulder. One foot was on the ground between Wade’s legs, the other in the air, toe pointed perfectly. Peter’s back was arched, but his eyes were locked on Wade’s. It was all complete core control that allowed Peter to maintain such a position with such grace.

The sight caused Wade to go from indecisive to plowing headlong into “10/10 would totally bone” despite the hit to his professionalism. Pulling Peter back up, Wade set his hands on Peter’s waist and they watched each other as they caught their breaths. They weren’t terribly winded, but the extended dancing certainly had their blood pumping. A few people on the edge of the floor politely clapped.

“I should powder my nose.” Peter said with a smirk full of promises before he turned and started walking in the direction of the men’s room.

It took everything Wade had not to let out the groan of desire filling his chest. After a pause, he followed Peter not too subtly. The sight of Peter’s ass strutting down the hall did all sorts of things to Wade’s imagination. Vivid fantasies of all the things he intended to do to that plump rear flashed through his mind rapid fire.

When they entered the bathroom, Wade could easily tell it was empty but for the two of them. He threw the latch on the door to make sure they wouldn’t be interrupted. Despite this being a bathroom quicky, the room itself was downright pristine. It was all sparkling tiles, gleaming stainless steel, and ambient lighting. It also smelled like literal roses. There were definitely worse places to hook up.

Peter had walked across the room and was leaning up against the opposite wall, hands splayed on either side of him. He arched his back some off the tile and slid one hand up to play with the decoration that dangled over his head. The smile he had was pure sex.

“Ohhh, you’re gonna get it.” Wade growled under his breath and walked over to Peter with powerful strides depicting the predator he was. That only seemed to arouse Peter more.

They met in a clashing of lips, hands immediately falling onto each other’s bodies, roaming all that they could. Peter kept up with Wade’s forceful kiss with far more animalistic desire than Wade had expected. Was the poor neglected husband pent up? Fuck, Wade hoped so. He wanted to make Peter cum so many times he blacked out.

Wade reached down and took two handfuls of that glorious ass he’d been dying to grope all night. Peter moaned at the feeling, thrusting his hips forward to rub against Wade’s. They were both hard, and it was very obvious even through their fancy dress pants. Pants that very much needed to be thrown across the room right now.

Before Wade could reach between them to remedy that, Peter flipped them, slamming Wade up against the wall. Peter’s mouth traveled over Wade’s jaw and down his throat, licking and biting at the skin. It caused Wade to spew a string of lustful obscenities. He liked a man that fought for dominance like this.

Reaching up, Wade gripped Peter’s jaw in one hand and pulled it forcefully to the side, exposing a long pale line of Peter’s neck. With his other hand, Wade pulled Peter’s collar down and latched his mouth onto the now exposed skin. He bit and sucked hard, determined to brand Peter as his own. Peter hissed and dug his fingers into Wade’s back as he rutted against Wade once more.

“Tell me what you want to do to me.” Peter whispered desperately.

Wade groaned, popping his lips off the spot and kissing his way up Peter’s neck as he talked. “I want to bend you over every available surface. I want your nails to open up the skin of my back. I want to ride your dick in your husband’s favorite chair. I want to make you scream my name until you lose your voice.”

Peter licked and nipped at Wade’s ear before he pressed his lips close. “You’re filthy.” He whispered it like it was a confession of love.

“Ohhh, Baby Boy. You have no idea.”

Wade could feel the smile spreading across Peter’s face. “I’m a scholar, you know. Teach me. I want the full course.”

“There will be tests.”

“I’m counting on it.”

With a lust filled curse, Wade’s lips were on Peter’s again. The man tasted like champagne and perfection. Wade’s hands struggled between them and found the first button on Peter’s suit. However, before he could even start unbuttoning it, someone started pounding on the door.

“You can’t lock a bathroom at a party!” A very old and pretentious voice yelled through the wood. Wade tried to ignore it, but the man kept knocking and more voices were muffled and talking behind him.

Wade cursed fluently under his breath and Peter just gave him a coy smile. He slipped away from Wade with a wink and then locked himself in a stall. Wade cursed again, straightened himself out, and then walked over to the door.

He opened it with an embarrassed grin firmly in place, one hand rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry, I must have hit lock by accident in my rush to get here in time. Champagne runs _right_ through me!”

A snooty old man glared back at him, crinkling his nose in disgust. “Don’t discuss your excretion problems with me.” He snapped before pushing past Wade.

Gritting his teeth, Wade attempted an apologetic smile. “Sorry, sorry!”

The man just grumbled and Wade took his leave. When he was back out in the main room, his forgotten job suddenly came to mind. Mostly because Harry Osborn wasn’t anywhere to be seen. And Wade knew for a fact he wasn’t in the bathroom.

A thought suddenly hit him with the force of a truck. Had this all been a setup? Did Peter purposefully distract Wade in order for Harry to leave?

Rushing back to the bathroom, Wade found no Peter. He searched the area but neither Harry or Peter were still at the party. Gritting his teeth in anger at being played, Wade quickly made his way to the parking garage. He had a gun hidden in the rafters just in case his subtle party hit didn’t go to plan. Which it most obviously hadn’t. It was a risk, but Wade had to take it.

There was a war going on inside Wade’s head about whether or not Peter had purposefully played him. It would make sense, but at the same time, Peter had been _very_ into their little makeout session. Or maybe Peter was interested but also played Wade? That seemed unlikely. Wade just really need to come to terms with the fact that he had been outsmarted.

Well, joke was on them. Deadpool was worth the money for a reason. Reaching the parking garage, Wade scrambled up a support column and into the rafters. Leaping between the concrete supports, he made it to his gun and searched the area, spying the armored Osborn SUV still in its place. Getting into position, Wade quickly sighted down the gun and waited. A group of security was walking in the car’s direction. Wade had a good idea of who was in the middle.

When they came into view, there was a short pause as they worked on getting Harry into the car. Wade breathed out, waiting for the perfect shot between the bodyguards. If he had to, he’d take one of them out, too. He was mad at being played and was determined to get this job done now.

Right as Harry was about to move into position, someone slid in to block him. It was Peter. He was practically all over the man, kissing him and giggling as Peter got him into the backseat. Wade’s jaw was painfully tight as he watched the scene, his mark disappearing from sight.

Then, out of nowhere, Peter twirled around and looked up, right at the spot Wade was hidden. There was no possible way that Peter could actually see Wade, but he looked at the spot purposefully as if he could. Wade was, quite frankly stunned.

Peter grinned and tapped the pocket of his suit jacket. He did the classic “call me” sign with his hand, a giant flirty grin on his face. Then with a wink, he slipped into the car after Harry. A few minutes later the SUV was out of sight and security gone.

Baffled, Wade sat up and reached into his breast pocket. There was a piece of paper in it. Pulling it out, Wade found a quickly scrawled note written in tight little letters. _“You were the most charming target I’ve had in awhile. If you’re man enough to follow through on all that flirting, I’ll be waiting. It better be one hell of a first date.”_ There was a little heart under that and a phone number.

“Why you little…” Wade grinned. “Challenge accepted, Baby Boy.”

Wade Wilson was in love.

**Author's Note:**

> I finally succeeded in creating a one shoooooot!!! I'M SO HAPPY! XD I refuse to contemplate what happens after this because it'll turn into a damn novel like my other stories. lol But I hope you enjoyed! The prompt just _refused_ to get out of my head and I woke up with this idea so here it is! hehe I hope it was as good for you as it was for me. ;-p
> 
> And if you are interested, this is my tumblr: <http://thatvixenchick.tumblr.com>
> 
> So by popular request, my cats have their own tumblr now. https://vixen13scats.tumblr.com/
> 
> I got aaaarrrrrrttttt for this!!! \o/
> 
> https://thatvixenchick.tumblr.com/post/170307443418/guuuuuuuuuys-look-what-i-got-3-eeeeee-its
> 
> (I have spoken to this artist, discussed this with them, have permission from them to show this picture, have permission to talk about this picture, have permission to note and link to the artist who drew it, and am in continuous contact with this artist. Thank you.)


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